Happiness, where is mine coming from?

We all go through tough times and think to ourselves: If it wasn't for _________ I would be happy, If I had _________ I would be happy and lots of ifs and buts. I used to fall in to this illusion, this false truth. I was always blaming something for preventing me being happy, the kids playing up, the lack of money, work, health, my past, the list went on and on. I wasn't willing to take responsibility for my own inner happiness and it was making me ill and depressed. I was in a constant state of blame.

As my journey of self help started and increased I listened to videos, listened to coaches, read articles and motivation quotes and I saw the illusion for exactly for what it was, an illusion. I learnt that the only person that can make me have the true happiness I was looking for was me. Nobody and nothing was going to give me what I longed for. It was time for me to change my thought pattern for the best. It was all on me, wow the pressure. To realise I was my own worst enemy, that it was me that was causing this upset to myself was a hard pill to swallow. How the hell was I going to make myself happy? Where on earth do I start? I felt at a complete loss.

I started with a process of working out who I was under all the beliefs I had gained about myself. I scraped away all the shit that had been thrown at me to discover the real me. This was a very deep process but it was very revealing and helped me to see why I has holding myself back from happiness. Ultimately I found that I didn't feel I deserved it and that stung a lot. By working out who I was and the reason I wasn't allowing myself to be happy, I then could work out which beliefs were causing this and where they came from. It was so empowering! I understood for the first time who I truely was, what I liked, what I wanted and how to start making myself happy.

I had found my starting point, I wanted to be healthy and so I started to run and do yoga, I wanted to learn so I went to college, I wanted to have good mental health and so I learnt to meditate and the list went on and I grew happier and happier despite all that was going on around me. I eventually got to the point where I felt I wanted to share this with others and I set up Soul Inspirations. Soul Inspirations has made me so happy and proud of myself, but, and this is the reason I am writing this today, I feel I have now gone back to my old pattern, in some ways anyway. I have had a bit of a rough year this year, it has included ill health, a job change and a loss of a job for my Husband, money worries and the usual other stresses of life. I have been very mindful of the emotions that it has caused me to produce within me and the stress and pressure it has been causing. I have worked though these using techniques I have learnt, meditation and the good old rant to a friend over coffee and cake technique but what I hadn't realised until it came to me in meditation yesterday is that I have lost my inner happiness again. I am projecting it on other things in my life. If the kids are goodI can have a good day, If we have money coming in then I won't be so stressed and then I will be happier and the main one, I am sorry to say, is Soul Inspirations. Dont get me wrong I absolutely love what I do with Soul Inspirations but what I have been doing is thinking to myself is that I really need it to take off so that one day I can give up work with will make me healthier and then happier. And this is wrong, so wrong. I need to find my inner happy again. Take back responsibility for my own happiness. The work I do with Soul Inspirations is a big part of that but not in the way it is right now. I want to do it just because I enjoy it, yes of course I want to reach more people and my goal is the same but I shouln't feel that I need that to be happy, likeI dont need to have money or the kids to be good. I can just be happy.

True inner happiness comes from within and is there to help with all the ups and downs, helps with all the other emotions you feel. Having inner happiness doesn't mean that you will never feel sad or fed up as it is good to feel other emotions but it helps you to "dance through the storm". You will find that inner happiness often comes hand in hand with inner peaceand the more you have of one the other will grow a long with it.

It isn't always easy to find and as I have just explained it isn't always easy to keep hold of, especially through the tough times, but once you have it makes such a difference. I would not be here writing to you if I hadn't started this process many years ago.

I am now ready to find mine again in the right way, relax and take the pressure off of all the other things in my life to make me happy, continue to grow as a person, a wife, a mum and a coach and enjoy the process.

If this resonates with you and you want to start your own journey of finding yourself followed by your inner happiness then please reach out for details on my free Who am I? online course or book a Free intial meeting to discuss your steps forward.

Sending you all Love, Light and Healing

Danica xx

Soul Inspirations with Danica

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